Thursday, August 20, 2009

*WARNING* | REPTILE ALERT | KNOW WHAT TO DO!

theGOPisDEAD crew just completed an intensive study of the reptilian right. We would like to share some information and warning signs to help you recognize one when you spot it! Careful though, due to the tiny size of the reptilian brain...it may appear somewhat vapid or listless, tricking you into a brain-dead conversation about guns, god, and gays. They have also been known to bite a can of Budweiser clean into! Approach with caution.

Reptiles, or members of the class Reptilia, are air-breathing, generally "cold-blooded" (poikilothermic) amniotes that generally have skin covered in scales or scutes. They are tetrapods (having or having descended from vertebrates with four limbs) and lay amniote eggs, whose embryos are surrounded by the amnion membrane. Modern reptiles inhabit every continent with the exception of Antarctica, and four living orders are currently recognized:

The majority of reptile species are oviparous (egg-laying) although certain species of squamates are capable of giving live birth. This is achieved, either through ovoviviparity (egg retention), or viviparity (offspring born without use of calcified eggs). Many of the viviparous species feed their fetuses through various forms of placenta analogous to those of mammals with some providing initial care for their hatchlings. Extant reptiles range in size from a tiny gecko, Sphaerodactylus ariasae, that grows to only 1.6 cm (0.6 in), to the saltwater crocodile that may reach 6 m in length and weigh over 1,000 kg. The science dealing with reptiles is called herpetology.

See the video below as this poor victim falls into the grips of a scaly far-right female specimen:

*WARNING* This is graphic footage of a reptile devouring a Jewish citizen with its powerful intellect *NOT*. Listen carefully to the end of the video as it displays its reTARD mating call.


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